Balaam's Heart

Well, even though I am in Exodus right now I am jumping ahead to Numbers 22. I recently had to share on the story of Balaam with the children I work with at church. So, this message is burning in my heart.

This morning as I spent time before the Lord I felt very convicted. I realized I too had a heart like Balaam. I have been making excuses to do what I want to do and worse...then resting on God's grace! That is so dangerous!!!

Aside from the Word I also have been reading a book called "In His Face" by Bob Sorge. In his chapter titled, In Hollywood's Face he writes, "You watch TV instead of praying because you enjoy food offered up to idols." The world practices and portrays it's idolatry on TV. You would never do the things they do on TV, because you don't serve their idols. But when you watch them do it, you are eating the food they offer to their idols.

It is very clear in the Bible that we can NOT have both the world and God. Either we choose the world or we choose God. It's very cut and dry.
The cross before me, the world behind me...no turning back! No turning back!

I realized I was so guilty of this. Not guilty of watching TV but guilty of wanting to watch a show or spend time on the computer more then I wanted to read God's Word. More then I wanted to spend time with Him!! Then I cry and wonder why my heart is hard!

So, back to Balaam... I realized the Holy Spirit kept telling me ever so quietly. Nudging me softy to shut the TV or computer off and go read the Word. Go spend time in God's face, in His presence. But like Balaam I tried to manipulate the situation to get my own way. I am blessed to still be here and not dead!!! Seriously...
I realize if I keep heading down that path death is waiting!

Thank the Lord He got my attention!

Whatever idol is in your life you must destroy it. The only way to soften our hearts is by His Word, prayer, and fasting. Whatever things of the world that are keeping you from that..it is an idol. Whatever you choose over God is an idol.

I know this is a difficult and sobering word. But we can not continue to believe that we can coast through our Christian walk, do whatever we want, and assume we are kingdom bound.
Bob Sorge wrote: Our problem is we have a convoluted concept of grace. We have come to define grace as "the tolerance of God that allows us to live with one foot in the church and one foot in the world." That's not grace, that's foolishness. Such a person is neither hot nor cold, and Jesus said "I will vomit you out of my mouth" (Revelation 3:16).
Grace is the kindness of God toward mankind, evidenced by sending His Son to die for us and redeem us to Himself, that we might be lifted from the filth of this world and live in the glory of His righteousness. God forbid that we should exploit His grace in order to return to the fiflth from which we have been redeemed.

It amazes me that even in the church most conversations I hear are about what's on TV, computer games, movies, sports, politics, ect.
We are Christians, which means we are set apart! Not of the world, redeemed from the world, from sin. But I feel like there is such a lie out there saying it's ok to be part of the world. Well, it's not! We are to be in the world but not of it.

I praise God that He has yet again given me another chance to turn from darkness. Jesus said the path is narrow and not many will find it. I praise God He has forgiven me but I also know that true repentance isn't just saying I am sorry but it is not doing that sin anymore.

In this moment of discovering His grace I started singing praise for a new day. The song, This is the day that the Lord has made came to my mind. I thought, the person who wrote this song must have fully grasped how exciting it is to have a new day. A new day to start over. His mercy is renewed every day. This is the day that the Lord has made. I WILL rejoice and be glad in it.